Wednesday, August 26, 2015

The Honest Preacher, an Underfable



      The Honest Preacher

          Once upon a time, there was a Preacher so honest that he preached:
          “This scripture is a work of fiction. All persons, places and events described in this revelation are imaginary; any resemblance to real persons, places or events is purely coincidental. Doubt this credo!”
          “Don’t believe just because you saw a picture, or read a book, or heard a song. Don’t believe anything just because it’s comforting or flattering or convenient or exciting. Nor should you believe because someone preaches vehemently. Preachment is not proof, and vehemence is not evidence! Believe only what you have tested out yourself, and found to be good, both for yourself and for others.”
          “I believe in reality. I believe that things are what they are, and they are not what they are not. I believe that no is not yes, and lies are not truth, and war is not peace, and slavery is not freedom. I believe that rivers run downhill, and that you can’t unscramble an egg. I believe that there is no benevolent tyrant, and no sure bet, and no free lunch.”
          “I believe that two plus two is four. Not five, not even if you bribe me; nor three, not even if you threaten me. It’s four, no more, no less.”
          The congregation cheered at the Preacher’s honesty; and they filled his collection plate; and they made his preachment their credo.
And if you believe that, then you will believe anything.

          Moral: May the believer beware.

          Comment: Absurd! When has preaching doubt ever made money?

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