Thursday, October 30, 2014

Flame Out, an Underfable

          Flame Out

          Once upon a time an Avatar’s path was blocked by a Flame War. A Troll hurled a fireball title-lined “Girls Have Cooties”; its foe, a Scold, threw back a fireball title-lined “Gamers are Gross”. The Basement Dweller hurled “I Wish You Were Dead”; the Moral Entrepreneur threw back “You’re Dead Already”.
The Avatar said, “Get a room, you two! Unbar my way, for I am on a Quest. Behold!” The Avatar gestured, and a vision appeared.
The Scold sneered, “What is that tawdry hovel?”
“It is the Palace of Scandal.”
The Troll grunted, “What’s up?”
“Within that Palace, a Maker is kissing a Messenger, in exchange for plaudits!” The Scold gasped, the Troll snickered, and the Avatar contined, “Yes, isn’t it delicious?  I am on a Quest for Citation.”
“Bo-ring,” the Troll lied.
“Irrelevant,” the Scold snipped.
The Troll said, “Our fight is much more interesting.”
The Scold added, “And original!”
The two started throwing fireballs again; so the Avatar pressed a ban hammer, and both Troll and Scold were ejected from Cyberspace.
The Avatar said, “It’s good to be a moderator,” and proceeded on the path towards the Palace of Scandal.

Moral: The enemy of my enemy is not my friend.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

A Talent for Failure, an Underfable

       A Talent for Failure

          (after Matthew 25:14-30)

          Once upon a time, a Boss was about to go abroad, so he called his three employees and gave each a dozen golden talents to invest until his return.
          Upon his return, the first employee said, “I invested a dozen talents in a real-estate bubble. The bubble burst, and nothing remains.”
          The second employee said, “I invested a dozen talents in an imperial adventure, but the war was lost, and nothing remains.”
          The third employee said, “I buried the dozen talents in the back-yard, for the world is full of thieves. Here are your dozen talents.”
          The Boss paid the first two employees two dozen talents each, for they were too big to fail; but he dismissed the third employee, for lack of innovation.
          That third employee then founded a company of his own, which remained in business long after the Boss’s company went bankrupt.

          Moral: You get what you pay for.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Kingdom of Graft, an Underfable

       The Kingdom of Graft
(after Matthew 20:1-16)

          Once upon a time, a Laborer toiled all day laying tarmac, but was paid no greater a share than the slackers who showed up at the last minute. He asked the Foreman why; the Foreman was defensive about his ‘generosity to his friends’.
          From this the Laborer deduced that the job was really a money-laundering scheme. So he showed up at the last minute the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that. The parking lot was never done, but that wasn’t the point.

          Moral: When it’s worst to be best, then it’s best to be worst.