Two Modest Mideast Proposals

          Two Modest Mideast Proposals

          Scenario 1: Draw

Palestinian:         You oppress my people and enslave us.

                             We can no longer tolerate your tyrannical rule.

                             Let my people go!

Israeli:                 You stand at sword-point with us and each other.

                             We can no longer tolerate your chaotic presence.

                             We divorce thee, we divorce thee, we divorce thee!

American:            Send us your tired, your poor,

                             Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free;

                             I lift my lamp beside the open door.

German (aside):            So the Jews play at being Arabs

                                      And the Arabs play at being Jews!

Chinese (replies):         And America swallows yet another

                                      Vigorous and turbulent minority.

Shiite:                            The exodus of Palestine is a calamity,

                                      But I hereby declare it written

                                      That the infidels shall follow soon after!

Sunni:                            We shall be well rid of the troublemakers

                                      But what would we do without Israel?

          Scenario 2: Truce

Israeli:                  Come, let us bargain together!

                             You may have your bribe of land

                             If you can accept as free and equal citizens

                             Even the minority of stubborn Jews

                             That we carefully settled there.

Palestinian:         You and we are in mutual checkmate;

                             Minorities wrapped within minorities,

                             Davids who are Goliath to smaller Davids;

                             What choice have either of us

                             But to surrender to peace?

American:            Behold and revere, O struggling world

                             The glorious dual sanctity

                             Of private property and civil rights;

                             For good fences make good neighbors

                             And good neighbors make good fences!

Chinese (aside):  How fervently the American preaches

                             The conservative liberal gospel

                             Of attachment to dust!

German (aside):  It’s called enlightened self-interest

                             For old wars are less profitable

                             Than new markets.

Shiite:                  Alas, we must now endure the presence

                             Of those annoying and distracting Israelis –

Sunni (aside):      Good!

Shiite:                  - but rejoice, we keep the Palestinians

                             Vanguard of revolution!

Sunni (aside):      Alas!