Trans-class

Trans-class

Caitlyn Jenner transgresses gender boundaries, Rachel Dolezal transgresses race boundaries, and gender and race are big deals in America; but our nation’s big-daddy-o injustice centers on class.

Therefore I wish to share with you my own identity dysphoria. It is an issue that I have struggled with my entire life, but only recently have identified; so I come out now, to you.

You see, I am a billionaire in a thousandaire’s body.

Inwardly, I am monstrously rich, but the banks only acknowledge one millionth of my rightful wealth. That’s their fault, not mine. It’s how the Man conspires to keep me down.

If only I could access the money that I feel I should have, then I would be buying legislatures and financing brilliant cultural innovations and re-engineering entire economies. I would be making a much bigger difference in the world than I do now.

Please do not make light of my predicament. It has caused real suffering for myself and for those I love. I would gladly make the class transition, despite the trouble of doing so, but alas there are no effective therapies, or competent specialists, addressing my condition. (Not to mention the many quack cures offered: for instance, soul-ectomy.)

          I have long struggled in private with my econo-dysphoria, but I suspect that I am far from alone. If you too are trans-class, then please come out too. Trans-class pride! In solidarity there is strength.

          What’s that? You say that I’m joking? That I’m not really that rich? So gender is fluid, and race is almost negotiable, but class is fixed? Is the thickness of one’s wallet more genuine than the color of one’s skin, the shape of one’s genitalia, or the contents of one’s character?

If so, then that shows what this culture really thinks is real!