Autotheism
Once upon a time Ertson the Patrobe thought to himself, “The
Gostack distims the Doshes. And surely God agrees that this is true.” Later he
changed his mind, and he thought to himself, “Surely God has changed His mind,
as I have, and now agrees that it is the Doshes that distim the Gostack.”
God saw these thoughts. God also saw that the part of Ertson’s
brain that Ertson used to contemplate God’s thoughts was the same part of his
brain that Ertson used to contemplate Ertson’s thoughts.
God
also knew that there is no Gostack, nor any Doshes, nor any such act as
distimming.
Ertson then thought to himself, “Other people agree with me,
too.” And God saw that the part of his brain that Ertson used to contemplate
the thoughts of other people was not the same part of his brain that Ertson
used to contemplate the thoughts of God, or of himself.
Ertson thought to himself, “God is my moral compass. God
points which way to go.”
An Angel fluttering nearby snarked, “Or You, to him, are his
moral inertial guidance, pointing which way he’s going already.”
Moral: Everybody who’s
right agrees with me.
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