Friday, June 30, 2023

Unchain Letter

Unchain Letter

 

          THIS LETTER was sent to protect you from luck, both good and bad. Receipt of this letter confers immunity to ALL FORMS of chain-letter bribery and extortion. You are now free to break any letter chain, without consequence. This works even if you are superstitious.

          You may hold onto this Unchain letter indefinitely, along with the next chain letter that finds its way to you. You may send copies of this letter to friends; and you may also refuse to send copies. It makes no difference.

          This Unchain letter admits freely that it is, in fact, a joke; yet it is no less credible than any Chain letter now in circulation. The following claims are completely baseless and absurd. Take them or leave them:

          An R.A.F. officer received this letter in the mail; many years later he also received a chain letter. It promised him riches if he duplicated it, and poverty if he broke the chain. Foolishly he made 20 copies and sent them to his friends. Four days later he got a phone call claiming that he had just inherited $23,000,000. However, this proved to be a wrong number, and the caller hung up.

          Naresh Singh of Bombay got a chain letter threatening him and his loved ones with death if he broke the chain. But this Unchain letter had gotten to him first; so he wisely decided to use the chain letter as a substitute for scarce toilet paper. That afternoon, while he and his family were visiting the marketplace, a crazed fanatic brandished an AK-47 and attempted to mow down the crowd; but the lunatic had neglected to load his weapon, so he was quickly taken into custody.

          Pablo Fuentes of Lima was under this Unchain letter’s protection when he got a chain letter promising him luck in the lottery. He sent out copies, and won nothing. Wen Xiao of Taipei received this letter, along with a chain letter; he took no action, and soon got a new job at equal pay.

          In 1984, a badly faded chain letter reached a young woman in Ontario. She promised that she would re-type the letter and send it on; but she delayed doing so. She was plagued by expensive car repairs until she received this Unchain letter. That very day she bought a new car, and her repair bills ceased.

          YOU HAVE RECEIVED THIS LETTER BY RANDOM CHANCE, NOT FATE.

          REMEMBER: YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FREE TO IGNORE ALL CHAIN LETTERS FROM NOW ON.

 

          Signed,

 

Miss Liberty

 

 

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