Does Money Exist? 9 of 13

         Part 8. Revelation of True Price.

            Please note that my aplutism is motivated by self interest, like any other economic theory. I doubt the existence of money, mine or anyone’s, in the hope of keeping around what little there might be.

            I invented aplutism as a satire, a conscious absurdity; and it works as a satire, for it reveals that its opposite – plutism – is an unconscious absurdity! For I put it to you that there is no such thing, intrinsically, as money, because there is no such thing as a free lunch, and intrinsically valuable money would be a free lunch.

            That’s the plutic fallacy. If money existed in itself, then money would breed money; a free lunch.

            Why did ten hundred thousand million dollars softly and suddenly vanish away? Because a gang of well-paid men thought that financial manipulation created value. They were plutists, in both senses; they had money, and they thought that their money was valuable in itself.

            The brokers trusted the Magic of the Marketplace to create wealth from money alone; and as a sign of this mystery they moved their money in a circle. Lo and behold, the Magic of the Marketplace did indeed manifest; and it manifested in a price; and the price was given by a mystic symbol; and the mystic symbol was the circle they moved their money in; and what number does the mystic circle symbolize?

            ZERO!