In Praise of Hypocrisy
What is Hypocrisy?
Hypocrisy is artificial excellence, counterfeit merit and
fiat piety. It’s the pretense of having some virtue that one does not in fact
possess. Its symbol is the mask, or the bubble; a surface concealing emptiness.
According to de Rochefoucauld, “Hypocrisy is the homage
that vice pays to virtue.” And just what kind of homage? Merely the sincerest
form; imitation.
Most essays about hypocrisy condemn it as a vice, indeed as a corruption of morality itself. They warn us of the hypocrite’s dishonor, criminality and malice. Those moral warnings are admirable; but this essay praises hypocrisy as a virtue.
I write this contrarian essay in honor of a certain
politician. He inspired me by force of example. And who is this avatar of
absolute hypocrisy? I decline to state. (That’s so you can judge the case
fairly, since you don’t know who I’m talking about.)
It all started with me fuming at the latest reports. The
scandal du jour was particularly stinky, and I’d share it with you now if only
I could recall that one outrage out of so many. The crime itself didn’t bother
me that much - I’ve grown jaded by their antics - no, what got to me was the
criminal gang’s attitude towards their crime. Their sheer effrontery.
The cover story was shoddy; they didn’t even try to make sense. What
disrespect! What brazen hypocrisy! So I fumed.
Then I stopped to think. What use was my indignation? Why
wear myself out with invective, and to whom was I to address it? To the
powerless? They’ll merely agree. To the powerful? They’ll merely ignore. Since
it’s pointless and rude to speak truth to power, why not instead say something
nice to power? Rather than criticize hypocrisy (and corruption, deceit,
criminality, malice, and so on) why not praise it?
That’s how this essay got started. Therefore I dedicate it
to a certain politician so worthy of being honored here that I refuse to stain
these pages with his infamous name.
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