Cat Waste
Explained
While cleaning out the litterbox,
I asked myself;
Why do cats shit?
The answer is, of course;
Because you can’t unburn a candle.
- that is, because
entropy increases. But then this raises the question:
Why can’t you unburn a candle?
Because tiny chaos always grows.
- which explains entropy
as molecular disorder. But then:
Why does tiny chaos always grow?
Because later is likelier.
- the thermodynamic arrow
of time. But then:
Why is later likelier?
Because the universe will expand forever.
- which links
thermodynamic and cosmological arrows. But then:
Why will the universe expand forever?
Because far stars fall up.
- which links the
cosmological arrow to cosmic acceleration. But then:
Why do far stars fall up?
Because vacuum sucks.
- which links cosmic acceleration
to dark energy. But then:
Why does vacuum suck?
Because empty space is active.
- which links dark energy
to zero-point energy. But then:
Why is empty space active?
Because everything is a little bit fuzzy.
- which links zero-point
energy to the uncertainty principle. But then:
Why is everything a little bit fuzzy?
Because particles are waves.
- which the uncertainty
principle to wave-particle duality.
And now I run out of
explanations! Why are particles waves? Beats me!
To recap:
Why do cats shit?
Because you can’t unburn a candle.
Why can’t you unburn a candle?
Because tiny chaos always grows.
Why does tiny chaos always grow?
Because later is likelier.
Why is later likelier?
Because the universe will expand forever.
Why will the universe expand forever?
Because far stars fall up.
Why do far stars fall up?
Because vacuum sucks.
Why does vacuum suck?
Because empty space is active.
Why is empty space active?
Because everything is a little bit fuzzy.
Why is everything a little bit fuzzy?
Because particles are waves.
So cats shit because particles are waves!
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