Covid Negotiations Imagined
American diplomat: You'd better clean up the wet markets, pronto.
Chinese diplomat: But that'll cost money.
American diplomat: Spend it. Your brand is on the line, and everyone is watching.
Chinese diplomat: All right, we'll do that.
American diplomat: Now, as for civil liability...
Chinese diplomat: Forget about us paying reparations, unless you want to pay reparations to Iran, Iraq, your Blacks, and your Natives.
American diplomat: Calm down, we're just talking about paying for vaccinations.
Chinese diplomat: Maybe for Africa, as a PR move. We'll think about it.
American diplomat: Now, about that lab leak...
Chinese diplomat: Don't worry, everyone responsible is dead.
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