* * * * * * * * *
“For
that was the way of the Pimple and its pimps.”
I
scratched my head, trying to put it all together. “So let me get this straight.
They built an entire industrial city
on top of a geological time bomb.”
“That’s
right,” said the ancient Tortoiselander.
“Which
they all intended to abandon at the last moment.”
“Almost
right. Whenever seismic activity indicated magma flow, they’d declare and
Emergency Holiday Energy Potlatch. Anything to bleed off the heat! Not only was
energy-wasting permitted, it was in
fact a religious duty!”
“Well,
that makes sense.”
“And
only plebes, wimps, and lowlife – that is, poor folk – only they would be gauche enough to cut and
run whenever the V-word rumbled! The ambitious wanted to be the last to leave!”
“So
what did they do?”
“To
dare each other, they’d throw a big party, in a big building set right atop the
Cap itself. And if you don’t attend, why then you’re not a member of their
club.”
“And
people attended?”
“Every
time so far!”
“But
that’s… stupid!”
“Yup.”
“I
mean really, truly, seriously
stupid!”
“Yup.”
“How
can anyone be that dumb?”
“Politics,”
he explained.
* * * * * * * * *
A hierarchical
city grew over Mount
Kah-Pey; the higher up,
on the repressed volcano itself, the pricier the neighborhood, with the peak on
the cap itself. The poor folk and the workers lived around the base of the
mountain, right next to the racetracks, the industrial parks – and the escape
highways.
The mountain was
covered with lights and electric trams. There was a sub-orbital launch
catapult, and lots of microwave power-beam emitters.
The mountain was
covered with utility boreholes, all very well-lit. No smoky industry to offend
delicate nostrils.
* * * * * * * * *
“But
plenty of heat pollution,” said Uncle Ted. “And whenever it gets too hot for
the rich folk…”
“Yeah?”
I asked.
“…they
just turn up the air-conditioning!”
“Wow!”
I marveled. I stared at the screen. “And their houses are so big!”
The external
telescopic camera was pointed at
Kah-Pey, and my uncle was showing me the sights.
“Their
mansions need to be covered with Faraday cages, to shield them from all the
microwave energy. But it doesn’t work; they still go sterile.”
“So
how do they have kids?”
“Mostly
they just adopt them. Or steal them.”
“Oh.”
I pointed at the monitor screen and said, “Isn’t that the Army base?”
“Right
next to the weapons lab.”
“And
what are those buildings for? They’re so well lit!”
“Those
are casinos.”
I
squinted at the screen and read, “T… &… A… Nitely. What’s T&A?”
“Well…”
He seemed embarrassed somehow. “Tits and ass.”
“I
see those here all the time, in the hot tub. So what?” Then I saw something
more interesting. “Ooo, ooo, look at that!”
Uncle
Ted said, “It’s the Mint!”
“Oh
wow!” I said. “And look at all those office buildings!”
“That’s
where the corporate bureaucrats work,” said Uncle Ted.” And see that building
there? The one which looks like a church? Guess what it is.”
“City
Hall?”
“No,
it’s the Stock Market! City Hall is over there.”
“You
mean there?”
“No,
no, that’s the central bank headquarters! The little building’s City Hall!”
“And
what’s that building?”
“That’s
the Narcotic Control Division’s Evidence Warehouse #1, where the narcs keep
their stash.”
“It’s
huge… and what’s that?”
“The
government records building. To help them remember everything, they keep a big,
big superconducting supercomputer there, chilling out in a vat of liquid
helium.”
“Liquid
helium?! Cool!”
“The
place is as cold as a bureaucracy’s heart,” said Uncle Ted. “I should know.”
“Oh,
you worked there? What’d you do?”
“Well…”
He seemed embarrassed somehow. “Mostly video programming.”
“You
mean, photoshopping?”
“Sort
of.”
“You
mean… lying?”
“Sort
of.”
“Cool!” I said. “And look! There’s the TV
studios! And the antennas!”
“Sending
and receiving,” said Uncle Ted.
“Mount Kah-Pey is watching you!”
“What
are those funny-looking buildings?”
“You
mean the ones at the peak? Right atop the Cap itself? They’re the churches, of
course. See those two domes?”
“I
know! They’re the Crystal Cathedrals!”
“Also
known as the ‘Family Jewels’. And do you see the Power Tower?”
“Right
in between? Sure! It’s so well lit!”
“Right
now all the lights are on.”
I
said, “Gee. What with those two domes and the tower right in between, you know
what it looks like?”
“Yes,”
said Uncle Ted. “Everybody knows.”
“Well,
I think it looks vaguely obscene,”
Sam groused. He had snuck up behind us and was peeking over our shoulders. “And
if there’s anything I can’t stand, it’s vagueness!”
I
asked, “Is dinner ready yet?”
“Hot
pizza and cold root beer await you in the TV chapel! So come and get it!”
We
came to get it. It was a traditional Tortoiselander evening. The TV was on, and
the pizza was going around. Sweet ropy smoke filled the air.
“It’s
Sister Jenny’s turn to load the bong!”
“Load
the bong!”
“Shh…
shh… the show’s starting…”
The
TV played a cheerful tune and announced, “Broadcasting From The Summit!” And
the party was on!
“Go!
Scoot!” uncle-cubed said to me. “Go and finish recycling the cans!”
So
I drifted out to the kitchen and began stomping root beer cans flat, one after
another after another after another. For some reason I felt dizzy and a bit
dazed.
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